“ When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway. ”

— Erma Bombeck

“ There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. ”

— Erma Bombeck

“ Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. ”

— Erma Bombeck